I love to ride my bike

I love to ride my bike, but for some reason hate getting ready to ride my bike. It seems to take me on average about 45 minutes, half an hour if I rush; from the time I decide to go for a ride, to actually walking out the door with my bike.

If I procrastinate over getting out for a ride, it is never over actually riding, but because of this chore of getting ready. How long does it take to throw on a jersey and a pair of shorts, you may ask? 

The first thing I do is pump the tires up, check for cuts, and give the bike a quick look over. Then fill two large water bottles with filtered tap water, and place them on the bike.

Then I get dressed, shorts, jersey, socks, that is relatively easy. I don’t put my shoes on until the last minute otherwise I am likely to slip on the kitchen or bathroom floor and fall on my arse.

I have done this on a few occasions, hurting nothing but my pride, but the thought that I could do myself serious injury makes me cautious.

Next I stuff my pockets. A multi Allen wrench, wrapped in a shop towel, and a hard plastic case which houses my cell phone. It is actually a plastic traveling soap case that I found at Target; it keeps the cell phone dry and protects it if I should fall. This is most likely when I would need a cell phone, and a broken one would not be much use.

I used to carry my wallet, until I read in the local paper that a man got robbed on the bike path I ride on, so now I just carry a photo copy of my driver’s license as ID, with relevant phone numbers written on it. If I were intending to go on a long ride, I would take some cash or a debit card.

I often take a banana with me, just in case I decide to ride a few extra miles. I think bananas are the ideal cyclist’s food. The perfect size and shape to fit in the back pocket, and the skin is nature’s own wrapper that is biodegradable.

Can it be I am almost ready, put my helmet on. No, wait I have to change my glasses, I have a special prescription pair for riding, with clip on sun glasses. Invariably they are covered in sweat from my last ride; I go to find the lens cleaner. Will I ever get out of here?

Okay, sun glasses on, can’t see a bloody thing; stumble to the bathroom. For some reason I can’t put a helmet on without the aid of a mirror.

Gloves and shoes on, am I finally ready? I know I am forgetting something; my bike is in one hand and the other is on the door knob. I stand there and do a mental check.

Sunscreen.....I forgot the fucking sunscreen. Off come the gloves, helmet and glasses; Go find the sports spray, quick once over on my arms and legs, that doesn’t take long. However, I can’t use it on my face as it says to keep away from the eyes.

Back into the bathroom, almost slip and fall on my arse, ‘cos now I’m wearing my cycling shoes with the cleats and hard plastic soles. Squeeze some different sunscreen from a tube and apply to my face, ears and the back of my neck.

Glasses, helmet and gloves back on, pick up my door key. Look up at the clock; forty-five minutes, just like I told you. Step outside and the heat and humidity hit me. I feel like I have just stepped into a bowl of hot cream of mushroom soup.

The summers here in South Carolina are brutally hot; it is important I get out as early as possible. Afternoon temps get to 90F or a 100F (32C to 38C) with the humidity anywhere from 80 to a 100%. Anyone who says you don’t need special clothes to ride a bike are welcome to do so. Not me if I’m riding more than an hour.

I look down at the bike, it needs a clean. Did I tell you, I also hate cleaning the bike, but I love to ride my bike

What to wear

The picture above is from 1952; the year I started racing and riding seriously. The photo taken at a British Hill Climb; typically an end of season event taking place around October when temperatures were falling slightly.

Notice what the spectators are wearing; regular everyday clothes. (Click on the picture for a larger image.) These cyclists probably rode a considerable distance to the event; the only special equipment is the cycling shoes. Cords or heavier tweeds were popular in the colder months, being warm, comfortable, and hard wearing.

The person in the center is wearing jeans; he is probably a newcomer to the sport and would soon be advised, or figure out for himself that jeans were neither warm or comfortable. The thing is these are regular pants or trousers, worn in conjunction with bicycle clips to keep the bottoms from being caught in the chain.

On the upper body you will notice a mixture of sweaters and light jackets. I always wore a woolen undershirt next to my skin, wool stayed warm even when wet from sweat or outside elements. Often when setting out on a ride in the early morning hours, I would place a sheet of newspaper under my top sweater, to keep the cold wind off my chest. Later as the day warmed up, this was discarded.


In the summer everyone wore regular shorts. (Picture left.) Racing clothes were made out of wool, they were expensive, needed to be hand washed, and took forever to dry. You could not throw them in the drier, or they would become matted and shrink.

No one wore racing gear on a training ride. I do remember that when I did put these clothes on to race, they felt so comfortable and unrestrictive that I automatically rode faster.

The shorts had a real chamois leather insert inside, and I would smear a handful of Vaseline on it before a race. It felt extremely weird for about the first minute, but then kept me comfortable throughout the race, with zero chaffing.

Even the pros did not wear racing gear for training rides. The picture above is of Fausto Coppi (Left.) with his brother Serse. (Right.) and a few other riders about to set out on a training ride.

The trousers they are wearing would be specially made for cycling, but they are styled after regular street clothes with the exception that they fit just below the knee, and are worn in conjunction with knee length socks. On the top they are wearing a variety of woolen sweaters.

My mother was an expert at sewing, and I would take an old pair of trousers, and have her cut them off just below the knee. She would sew some wide elastic on the bottom to fit under my knee. The material cut from the bottom of the leg, she would make a double seat, which added comfort and made them wear longer.

By the 1970s, proper cycling clothes were available, but there were training clothes and racing clothes. Now it has become acceptable to train or simply ride for pleasure in racing gear.

I would not dress up in Lycra for a short trip to the post-office or store, but if I am riding for an hour or more, I love it and would not go back to wearing regular clothes for a long ride. The modern clothes are so comfortable, and the great thing is, I can throw the shorts and jersey in the washing machine, they are almost dry after the spin cycle, and air dry in a few hours.

However, in the 1950s we rode a hundred plus miles in a day in regular clothes so we proved that it can be done. You don’t have to wear special clothes to enjoy cycling, it is a personal choice; wear what you feel comfortable in.

Having said that; if you were invited to a formal dinner where everyone wore a tuxedo and black tie, you would look out of place if you showed up in casual clothes. Maybe you are thick-skinned enough that it wouldn’t bother you, but other guests would feel uncomfortable. The same would have been true if someone had shown up on a 1950s Club Run wearing racing gear.

It would also be the same today if I showed up dressed in street clothes, 1950s style for a ride with a group all wearing Lycra and helmets. Even if I was fit enough to stay with the group, some in the group would feel uncomfortable.

I know there will be others who disagree with me on this one; I can just hear the comments on “elitism.” We live in a social structure, and I feel that although we ultimately wear and do as we please, we do have a certain obligation not to offend or make others in our immediate peer group feel uncomfortable.

I use the term “immediate peer group,” because it seems when we wear Lycra we offend Joe Public, and that is not my problem, I will conform within limitations. Where Joe Public is concerned the “Gay Lycra outfits,” is just an expression of their contempt for the fact that we are on the road.

I remember in the 1950s, all the stuff you would normally carry in the rear pockets of your jersey, we carried in a small canvas bag called a Musette bag. (Tools, food, money, batteries for lights, etc.) I remember the general public, even those who used a bicycle for transport, would always ask, “What do you carry in those stupid little bags?”

Drivers delayed briefly by a group of cyclists wearing regular street clothes, the group I’m sure would be labeled, “Leftist, hippy, tree-huggers;” you can’t win that one.

Imagine the confusion that would be caused by a group or older gentlemen cyclists, dressed as the Italian Pro group above. How would they be labeled; “Old Poofters on Bikes,” maybe?

Whatever you do, don’t let the clothes you feel comfortable wearing, stop you from riding a bike.


Pictures are from Classic Lightweights, UK.
and Fausto Coppi, It.

Batman and Robin never had this problem

Road cyclists as a group are under attack again. Recently there was the New Jersey Quick Release Ban, now there is a movement afoot to ban cycling shorts in Salt Lake City, Utah. A group calling themselves Citizens for Decent Public Attire, finds the skin tight cycling shorts worn by local cyclists, offensive.

The fears of this group are unfounded and the women of Utah are safe; I can assure them that there is nothing quick release about a pair of bib shorts.

After giving this issue much thought, it occurred to me that Batman and Robin, Superman and all the other super heroes of yesteryear wore tights and never had this problem. And they were on television in an era when censorship was far more strict than today.

For example, at that time, married couples could not be shown in the same bed together. Also remember, this was children's television and had the brim of the hat been even slightly visible, there would have been hell to pay.

So how did the Dynamic Duo get away with it? It was not that these actors were not well endowed; they didn't call Robin "The Boy Wonder" for nothing.

The answer was in discrete padding in their tights that made them appear Genitalia-less. Only the slightest hint of a bulge in the pubic area, just enough to distinguish Batman from Batwoman. The result, no one was offended.

The manufactures of cycling shorts should take note; the technology to make the penis as invisible as a stealth bomber on the radar screen was there in the 1950s, and can be used again today.

It appears that Performance Bicycle may already be using this concept. (See picture, right.)

I can imagine the potential for some catchy advertising like: "The Anti-bacterial padding in these shorts is cleverly placed for a low profile, less pretentious package."

Or: "Extreme comfort level for both the wearer and the casual observer."

It also occurred to me, and again, the idea sprang from television censorship. Today anything offensive we might see on TV is Pixilated; blurred out so we can't see the details.

Here is an idea; why not print the pixilation right on the shorts in the crotch area.

Any innocent bystander who might accidentally gaze in that direction, would see the pixilation, and being accustomed to seeing this on TV would be satisfied that the matter had been taken care of.

The pixilation should be extended from the crotch to the rear of the shorts, because when those white shorts get wet, we can see your butt crack.

I should start charging money for ideas like this, but I do it for the good of the sport of cycling.

Give up Lycra and my Helmet; not Bloody Likely

A British online magazine called City Cycling appears to be aimed at people commuting to work in large cities. It is encouraging that there are enough people doing this to show interest and support for such a website.

However, a recent article suggests that cyclists should abandon lycra and helmets. The author of this piece seems to think that cyclists dressed in such a style are seen as “not human” or are from another “tribe,” and consequently unworthy of attention.”

The idea is, dressed in street clothes, i.e. jeans and tee shirt or a suit and tie, other road users will see us as human beings just like them. As a result they will be a little more tolerant towards us. Somehow, I don’t think so.

If I ride down the middle of a traffic lane, take the lane so to speak, because I am attempting to turn left; the person behind me, delayed for a few seconds is not going to be any less pissed off if I look like I just stepped off the cover of GQ.

As for the idea that the driver doesn’t see me as human? He knows I’m human, otherwise he would run me down like a squirrel. I would like to think it is human decency that prevents him from doing so, but more than likely it is not wanting to deal with the consequences, that is the biggest deterrent.

In a few cases, I think it is the fact that they could run me down, but are not allowed to in a civilized society that makes them so mad. They will sit behind a farm tractor doing ten miles per hour for as long as it takes, and deal with it, but God forbid they should have to slow to fifteen or twenty miles per hour for a few seconds behind a cyclist.

When I go riding I put on my team jersey, not because I want to be seen as belonging to some other tribe; I just want to be seen, period. I choose a team jersey for its bright colors, not because I support that particular team.

The other reason I choose a genuine team jersey is the quality of the product. It is designed to give the wearer maximum comfort under extreme racing conditions. So I know during my modest exertions I can concentrate on riding my bike without being focused on how uncomfortable my clothes make me feel.

Designed to keep the wind off if it is a little chilly, or to keep me dry and comfortable if I am sweating like the proverbial pig. I can throw it in a cold wash when I’m through riding, and it is practically dry after the spin cycle.

Another quote from the article, “Normal people don't wear polystyrene hats.” Bicycle helmets don’t give total protection, and no one should be lulled into a false sense of security by wearing one.

I was wearing a helmet when I hit an SUV last December and still came away with a hairline skull fracture. But I was glad I had a little Styrofoam between my head and the very solid side of that vehicle, and I am sure without it I could have been injured more.

You don’t have to wear lycra and a helmet to enjoy cycling, and I am not advocating that everyone should dress thus. It is a sport that can give pleasure at any level. I just happen to be an ex-racing cyclist and still enjoy a road bike.

I cannot ride unless I am going balls out, as fast as I can. It is what I have done all my life; I try to maintain a level of fitness so I can continue to do so. I cannot ride in this fashion in a suit, or in blue jeans feeling like my nuts are in a tourniquet.

In spite of my earlier comments, when I’m on the road I try not to adopt an “us and them” attitude; it serves no useful purpose. Traffic is not going to get any lighter, so I must deal with it. However, I am going to exercise my right to ride on the public highway.

I try to be considerate and courteous at all times; if someone slows down and is cautious when passing, I will often give them a little thank you wave. My way of saying thank you for not passing at fifty miles an hour, missing me by inches.

Most road users don’t mind sharing the road with a cyclist if they are predictable and give clear signals of their intentions. They dislike cyclists who weave in an out of traffic for example.

If I wear lycra and a helmet at least I look like I know what I am doing. If I wear street clothes; I could be someone who just decided to “go green” the previous week, or someone who has just got their third DUI ticket.

Cycle-Clips

No, I don’t mean the one-eyed giant from Greek mythology; that’s Cyclops.


I mean cycle-clips; made out of spring steel, usually coated in plastic, and they hold your pant leg at the bottom so they don’t get caught in your chain.

Very important if you ride a fixed gear bike as Fritz found out recently when his entire right pant leg was ripped from his leg.

Growing up in England, cycle-clips were standard equipment; as common in any household as a can-opener. If you owned any kind of bike you owned cycle-clips.

I don't understand why they never caught on the US.


Footnote: Cycle-Clips also can be used in the sport of Ferret Legging.